Plastic In the Afterlife

The irony of Obama's hate crimes bill

On Wednesday President Obama signed his name to a defense bill that not only authorizes $680 billion in spending, yet cuts wasteful projects such as the cold-war era F-22 fighter jet program, but also makes it a federal crime to assault people based on sexual orientation.  On the surface, the irony of tacking the hate crime provision on to a defense bill of all things is wholly evident.  The military has been practicing their Don't Ask, Don't Tell (DADT) policy since 1993, a policy that "prohibits any homosexual or bisexual person from disclosing his or her sexual orientation or from speaking about any homosexual relationships, including marriages or other familial attributes, while serving in the United States armed forces" and prohibits superiors from investigating service personnel based purely on the suspicion of homosexuality.  This policy openly hinders the personal freedom of gays and bisexuals to (gasp!) be who they are!  This is one of those stupid policies that creates an "elephant in the room" type scenario.  We all know that there are gays and bisexuals serving in the military, but let's not acknowledge it in any way shape or form.  That's like making a policy that prohibits people from acknowledging their nationality.  "I know your ancestors are from Denmark, but for God's sake, man---don't say it!"  Now, I know there's a large number of people who feel that homosexuality is a choice, and for some, maybe it is, but on the whole, it is an issue of biology determined in the womb.  Basically, during a male fetus' development, the brain does not absorb enough testosterone for the future adult male to be attracted to females (I can't adequately explain it---watch the National Geographic video below). 

This hate crimes bill was named for Matthew Shepard, a gay Wyoming man who was murdered more than a decade ago.  This bill "expands current hate crimes law to include violence based on gender, sexual orientation, gender identity or disability."  There is nothing negative about the passing of such a measure, but I just find it so odd that bills totally unrelated to each other are paired up in an effort to get the necessary votes to pass.  What this says to me is that there wouldn't be enough people in our government who care enough about basic human rights to pass a bill that would ensure that those who victimize a certain segment of the American population based solely on an attribute would receive the proper punishment?  Am I correct in this assessment? 

Another thing at work here is the fact that President Obama and his administration has largely disappointed the gays and bisexuals who cast their hopeful votes for Obama, buoyed up on his campaign promise to abolish the Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy.  Now, I am sure that they are thrilled that he fulfilled his campaign promise to pass the Matthew Shepard Act, but gays are still waiting for the repeal of both DADT and the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), both unfulfilled, but highly publicized campaign promises. 

In light of the economic crisis, coupled with the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan and the health care debacle, the Obama administration has been stretched to the brink on an endless list of domestic and foreign issues, so it is understandable that the progression of social issues has been slow at best.  All in all, it is a good thing that this hate crimes bill has been passed, no matter how they got it through.  Hopefully Don't Ask, Don't Tell, which has led to the discharge of close to 13,000 servicemen and servicewomen, and cost our nation an estimated $363 million dollars (lost in training, recruiting, and other related costs) since 1993, will soon find itself square on Obama's chopping block.  Until then, I guess "mum's the word".          

Rush Limbaugh: Don't Meet Me In Saint Louis

Rush Limbaugh was recently dropped from the group that was trying to buy the Saint Louis Rams.  Par for the course, Limbaugh went on his radio show and started pointing the finger (at everyone but himself, of course).  Limbaugh lashed out angrily at the NFL Player's Association Executive Director, DeMaurice Smith, who Limbaugh dubbed an "Obama-ite", and at Reverend Jesse Jackson and Reverend Al Sharpton, who LImbaugh called "race hustlers", for his being dropped from the group and being denied a minority share in the Saint Louis Rams.  Reverends Jackson and Sharpton had voiced their objections to Limbaugh's being a potential minority owner (now, doesn't that choice of words sound strange?), citing racially-insensitive comments Limbaugh had made in the past in regards to black NFL players.  Limbaugh was forced out of the broadcast booth at ESPN in 2003 when he said of Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb:  "I think what we've had here is a little social concern in the NFL. The media has been very desirous that a black quarterback do well."  He also implied that McNabb was overrated and was only getting the attention and accolades he was receiving purely because of his race.  In 2007, Limbaugh said this insightful statement on his radio show:  "The NFL all too often looks like a game between the Bloods and the Crips without any weapons. There, I said it."  I'm sure there were some die-hard Limbaugh devotees who exclaimed, "Finally!  Someone said it!  It's about time!" 

Ever the voice of reason and wizard of social commentary, Limbaugh tried to draw a connection between the Obama administration's actions during the recent economic meltdown and his own recent ousting from the ownership group.  Said Limbaugh:  "What is happening to the National Football League, what is about to happen to it, has already happened to Wall Street, has already happened to the automobile business."  Limbaugh said that he has "lost nothing" over the incident and would still be a supporter of the NFL; however, he stated emphatically that "On the other hand, our country has lost a great deal. A lot more than most people realize at the moment."  He capped it all off by saying that what happened to him in this recent incident was "Obama's America on full display."

Perhaps the biggest oversight in all of this is the fact that Limbaugh was kicked out of the ownership group because he had suggested a radical change be made to the name of the Saint Louis Rams.  You see, he wanted the name "Rams" to be an acronym that would stand for:  Racists  Advocating  Mandated  Segregation.

What a meathead---literally...

 During player introductions in yesterday's Seattle Seahawks vs. Jacksonville Jaguars football game, Seattle  Seahawks' fullback Owen Schmitt repeatedly struck himself in the forehead with his helmet, causing blood to gush down his face and onto his uniform.  Schmitt wasn't even ready until the second play from scrimmage because the trainers had to fix up the gash on his forehead and clean up his uniform before he would be allowed on the field.  Apparently, Schmitt has a history of such self-inflicted head wounds.  While playing at West Virginia University, Schmitt was caught on film on the sidelines smashing his head with his helmet after a play.  Maybe he was just feeling kind of sentimental (emphasis on mental) when he decided to relive the excitement of his college days by braining himself before Sunday's game.

Seahawks' head coach Jim Mora was concerned about Schmitt's actions because he was the only active fullback on the roster. Said Jim Mora about the incident:   "I said, 'Hey pal, if you get hurt, we don't have anybody else.  That's just his enthusiasm. He came over and apologized. I told him, 'Use your head.'"  Ba-dum-bum!  This Schmitt sounds like the kind of player who meets his challenges head on!  He's got a real head for the game!  Heck, he really gets his head into the game!  He is head and shoulders above the rest!  Um...okay.  I'm okay now.

Anyway, Schmitt's teammates were all abuzz about how his actions fired them up.  Seahawks' wide receiver T.J. Houshmandzadeh remarked, "It gets you to the point like, 'Wow, this man here is ready to play.' You can't let a guy like that down when he's busting his forehead open.  That's going to be a scar for life. And it's one game."  The Seahawks did crush the Jaguars 41-0, so I guess that this intentional bloodletting did have its desired effect. 

In fact, so positive was the reaction of the team, that Schmitt plans to top himself next week.  What is it?  Well, not to give it all away, but let's just say it involves some thumscrews and a pair of forceps.  Stay tuned, kids!